Tapping Into My Indian Roots - Former American Born Confused Desi (ABCD)
Recently I had the opportunity to sit down with Ace, a young Desi influencer, for an interview about my latest music video. This project is really personal to me because it was filmed in Kolkata, India. What started as a casual trip to visit family turned into something much bigger: a step into my roots, my culture, and honestly, a new chapter in my journey as an artist.
Growing up, I didn’t really feel connected to being Indian. I was an American Born Confused Desi aka ABCD. For those that don’t know, it’s a term that first generation Indian Americans have made to describe being an American Born Confused Desi. I come from a privileged background with private schools, family vacations, music lessons, and educated parents. I grew up very westernized. I don’t speak Bengali fluently, though I can understand enough to be dangerous. For most of my life, I didn’t think much about where I came from because it never seemed to fully fit into the world I was living in.
Interestingly, I felt a little out of place around white people, when I was the only Indian kid in class. Conversely if anything, I felt more out of place around other Indian peers. Maybe it was because I didn’t grow up speaking the language, or because my experiences were just different. There was always a part of me that didn’t quite know where I belonged.
That is why this recent trip to Kolkata hit different. Before I visited Kolkata I didn’t really know how Indian I was, but after my visit I realized I’m Indian as fuck. Shoutout to all the cute Bengali girls too.
Walking the streets of my parents' hometown, shooting a music video in the same city they grew up in, made me proud in a way I didn’t expect. For the first time, I felt connected to something bigger than myself. It wasn't just about making a video with cool visuals. It was about honoring where I came from. Even though I still feel like a visitor in some ways, it planted a seed that is growing every day.
The interview with Ace opened my eyes even more. I realized there is a whole generation of young Indians in America who identify as Desi, proud of their culture but also navigating the same kind of split identity I have felt. For the first time, I didn’t feel alone in that experience.
In the interview, we also talked about my journey with music. How I started dropping hyperpop records. How I am building a lane that feels both American and international. Now my dream is to tour across Asia one day. Performing at weddings, parties, festivals, wherever people want to turn up and have a good time. Kolkata showed me firsthand that the energy is there. The love for music, for celebration, for connection, is real.
Ace asked me about the message behind my song, and it is simple: if you want something, you have to push through the process, even when it is hard, even when it feels endless. That is true for life, and it has definitely been true for me in finding my voice, both as an artist and as a person reconnecting with my culture.
This journey is just beginning. For the first time, I am not trying to choose between two sides of myself. I am learning to embrace both and discover new insights.
You can watch more from my interview with Ace on YouTube. Click here to see the Go For The Ride Music Video.
Big shoutout to Ace for the conversation and to everyone supporting the movement. There is a lot more to come.
TXM247
